Benjamin Fry and depression

Natalya:

Excellent piece. Worth the read! It’s about trauma more so than depression though.

Originally posted on Free psychology:

‘I had a golden life, so why was I falling apart?’: TV psychotherapist Benjamin Fry was devastated by depression. Then he discovered a radical new treatment

By Benjamin Fry

PUBLISHED: 23:01 GMT, 27 July 2013 | UPDATED: 23:01 GMT, 27 July 2013

Eton- and Oxford-educated, a millionaire by 30 – psychotherapist Benjamin had every advantage. But when he suffered a breakdown and all treatment failed, he had to delve into his childhood to unlock its cause
 
'Only the thought of my children stopped me from killing myself' ‘Only the thought of my children stopped me from killing myself’

Your life looks fine – even enviable – on the surface. But underneath you are more stressed and anxious than anyone realises. You’ve been called ‘oversensitive’ or accused of ‘overreacting’ because the setbacks and stresses that other people seem to take in their stride can knock you for six. You’ve also been told that you are attractive, bright, full of potential, yet…

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End of the Month Already!

Gosh, I can’t believe how quickly September seems to have arrived. Maybe it’s already

September

September (Photo credit: Helgi Halldórsson/Freddi)

September in your part of the world. Here, there’s another few hours to go. I think September always makes me feel like it’s a sort of beginning or start to something new. Likely this comes from having been in school for the majority of my life and learning to associate September with a new calendar year (academic). But now that I am out it feels nice to simply take in the new temperatures and changes that come usually by October, if not before then. I love autumn. It’s the best season in my humble opinion. All seasons have their merits but being a person who enjoys days perfect for a sweater, autumn is best.

It’s been awhile since I posted anything on here. My other blogs have been neglected too but this one especially. So my apologies for that. I will try to post more frequently-so long as I have something worth posting about. Not that you don’t all want to hear about the more banal aspects of my life….. ;)

Lately I have been trying to establish more of an online presence regarding my online shops and social media. It’s not been the easiest thing to figure out where to spend my time and what I ought to be focusing more attention on. Promotion isn’t really my forte but I am grateful for Twitter, facebook and other lesser known social media sites. One that you may not have heard of yet is WANELO which stands for want, need, love and features anything you can imagine that is sold online. It’s easy to post stuff to and you can share to facebook and Twitter at the same time if you wish. I like it for its ease of use and little need for tech skills above the moderate level (at most).

The two online shops I focus most of my time on are Zazzle and CafePress. They are sites where you can place your design on a product and it will give you a royalty if it sells. It’s not a get rich quick sort of thing by any stretch. I’d wager most sellers don’t even manage to cash out. You have to earn $25 American or $50 if Canadian on Zazzle and most royalties are small. CafePress on the other hand allows you to cash out at $20 if you’re Canadian so I am glad about that. Maybe I will manage that. I have yet to sell anything from my CafePress shop but I only started adding products to it last week. My Zazzle store has been open since last October and I haven’t made enough to cash out yet on there!

I’ve been quite busy this past month so maybe I’ll do another post about everything I have been up to. For now I’ll just end here.

©Anya, 2012-2013.

Tummy Trouble

This morning I was awoken by an uncomfortable feeling and resulting visit to the “little girl’s

Need electrolytes? Don't buy the artificial on...

Need electrolytes? Don’t buy the artificial ones, do your own! (Photo credit: KLIM ANDREEV)

room” whereupon I spent longer than usual. The byproduct wasn’t relief but a feeling of weakness. Normally I don’t have many tummy complaints so this was a surprise. Not sure what precipitated it but it might have been a bar I ate. The difficult thing following such incidents is the subsequent dehydration. Now I didn’t ‘toss the cookies’ or anything but I won’t go into details…. What happens in the bathroom stays there! LOL I just hope this was a one off sort of incident. There’s only so much fluid loss one can take. My electrolytes are already out of kilter from this morning’s ‘surprise’.

So I haven’t really done much today. Feeling much too lethargic after this morning. Why do electrolytes take so long to get back to normal? I’ve been munching on whole wheat saltine crackers to get some sodium back. I’d have a banana for potassium but the fruit flies have been having their way with the remaining two and I don’t feel like eating them now! Actually those pesky critters have taken over the kitchen so when I have more energy again I will have to vacuum them up. Vacuuming the fruit flies up works well but likely gives me bad karma for killing so many live creatures.

Hope your Sunday or Monday is going well :)

©Anya, 2013.

Where Did Time Go?

Wow, I can’t believe I haven’t blogged on this blog for several weeks. I feel guilty but did post a

Shed

Shed (Photo credit: Beedle Um Bum)

few times on my other blogs. Really I have just been busy so haven’t done much posting on any of my blogs I keep. Last week I decided to tackle my parents’ garden shed that hadn’t been cleaned in decades. It took me three days just to clear out the junk and another day or so to really straighten up and clean it. But it looks pretty good now. I even vacuumed some inside the shed because there was lots of ‘gunk’ and ‘icky’ stuff I didn’t want to stir up with a broom or duster.

I’ve been doing a lot of clearing out of junk these past months and the changes have been remarkable. No longer do I feel like hiding in shame if an unannounced visitor comes around. Before I would have wanted to crawl under a rock because the place was so messy and dirty. But I decided this year, once and for all, I was sick of living under such conditions and wanted to improve things. So I really stepped up to the plate and have done quite a lot to make the place look better. Holy crow did we ever have a tonne of garbage in the first few months! Lots was recyclable and able to be donated but we had lots for the regular garbage too. I felt guilt over that but the feeling of satisfaction I got after decluttering kept me from keeping any of it.

Counselling has been going alright. I go bi-weekly or twice a month and just discuss whatever is on my mind. These last couple of visits I have been reviewing material from a book my counsellor recommended to me “Embracing Your Inner Critic”. I purchased it in electronic form to save the shipping and handling fees! LOL Yesterday was one of my appointments and we decided I could rename my “problems” to “a spot of bother” because it sounds less troubling and easier to deal with! I came up with it because I recalled Winnie the Pooh referring to his troubles that way. Seeing as how Winnie the Pooh could always make me feel better I went with that. Now I will refer to any issues I have as “a spot of bother”!

Besides counselling and cleaning I have been working on promoting my Zazzle store products. I started a blog on Blogger so I could put flash panels of my products there and post my products without feeling apologetic about it. You can’t put flash panels on WP.com anyhow so I had to chose Blogger for that purpose. I also started a couple of facebook pages when I realized they were free so long as you don’t need advertising. So now I have a page on facebook for my Reflections on Life Thus Far blog and my Zazzle products. Plus I started a new Twitter account for my Zazzle products so I can Tweet just my products I design in Zazzle! It’s a lot of effort to do this promoting stuff. I haven’t sold anything because of it yet but I hope to.

©Anya, 2013.

Human Contact aka Socializing

Today I did something I haven’t done in ages, socialize. It was nice; I met up with a couple

Friendship is... (365/136 May 16, 2013)

Friendship is… (365/136 May 16, 2013) (Photo credit: ConnectIrmeli)

of people from a group I’d been in before and we chatted and ate together. I really don’t go out much so actually making arrangements to have a social engagement was quite novel for me. Not that I’ve never socialized before or met up for a meal with people but it’s been awhile! Hopefully we can meet up again and make this a more regular practice.

It was quite warm and humid today but I enjoyed being in the company of people I hope will become permanent friends, rather than nice people I lose touch with. Friendship requires a bit of work but once you have developed it I find it gets easier. I do wish it wasn’t so hard for me to keep friends but I have undergone a lot of personal changes over the past 3-5 years and even more over the past decade. When you change and become healthy the same people that were in your life all along don’t always fit in anymore. I’ve found many of the friendships I had with people didn’t really fall apart exactly so much as drifted apart. The less you are like who you are when you became friends in the first place the harder it is to maintain that relationship.

Has anyone ever had to leave behind friends because of personal changes that made it difficult to continue the friendship? Did you manage to build new friendships or has it been impossible because you don’t know how to meet new people? I still have friends from university but they are more like acquaintances than friends or I have drifted away from them altogether. These are natural occurrences though as we change who we are-or perhaps I should say become who we are. When the pretending and need to please falls away what do you have left? What’s left can scare people because they aren’t willing to be as authentic with themselves or they simply can’t relate to you anymore.

I strongly believe we meet the people we need to in order for us to grow as humans. The ones we love or hate are in our lives to teach us about ourselves if we pay attention. I might not enjoy some of the people I have met but they have all taught me valuable lessons-usually the same ones over and over again because I failed to master them the first time. There have also been some very wonderful people too though for which I am grateful for.

Hope your weekend is going well :)

©Natalya, 2013.